12 Pieces of Advice I Wish I Got in my Early 20’s
Do you come to important realizations wondering why nobody ever told you about them?
In your early 20’s, you shape your views and opinions based on your experiences and learnings. That includes advice from your family, friends, and school. But the teachings are never integrated, and important lessons are missing.
They are unwritten teachings that they have removed from the entire education system. You have to figure them out yourself while growing up.
Let me save you a lot of time and sweat.
Below are the 12 pieces of advice I wish I had in my 20’s. I will give to every person I know turning 20.
1. Don’t follow the rules
Your school, your society, and your home give you a script to follow in life. A lot of what the script says is good, but it should by no means define your life. Be the director of your life.
Don’t follow the herd.
Think aside when everyone is following something. Robert Cialdini’s excellent book Influence offers insight into how ‘Social Proof’ works.
If everyone is doing something, it does not mean it’s correct. People prefer going along with the crowd without a personal view or understanding.
Trust your beliefs and judgment, even if it’s against the direction of others.
The more you follow your instincts, the stronger your confidence will grow.
Building a self-guided direction at a young age will upgrade your decision making.
“Learn the rules like a pro, so you can break them like an artist”. — Pablo Picasso
2. Choose high-quality friends
Motivational speaker Jim Rohn said that out of the five people we spend more time with, we become their average.
Although this is not something new, the problem is that we apply this relatively late in life.
The impact and influence of young friendships are enormous. Don’t underestimate this.
Choose your friends wisely by considering their character, behavior, values, interests, and principles.
A wrong friendship can take you to directions you wish you never bore, and without even realizing it.
You can easily pick up harmful habits or ideas that will deviate you from a good life.
“Don’t make friends who are comfortable to be with. Make friends who will force you to lever yourself up.” — Thomas J. Watson
3. Learn to say ‘No’
The faster you build self-esteem, the sooner you learn to say easier ‘No’. You don’t mind disappointing others because you know your worth.
For me, it was hard to follow that. I wanted to be nice to everyone and accepting. The price you pay is wasting time with people you don’t like or activities of no value.
From a young age, stick to your guns. You won’t regret it.
4. Make money early and save
Making your own money is essential in appreciating it.
The later in life you make money, the longer it will take for you to mature financially. Don’t wait.
Wealthy people started working very early in life. It’s no coincidence.
Starting early, save. Having money on the side will provide a degree of comfort and make you think twice before spending.
When you are ready, invest. Get educated on personal finance and always set aside part of your monthly income. The sooner you start, the more savings you will have, and the more prepared you will be for your future life.
5. Don’t Fear Anything
A lot of the things I didn’t do younger was because of fear — imaginary fear, which never happened. An illusion of what may or could happen.
The only fear you should pay attention to is the real fear. You are being lost in the woods, staring at a wild animal, someone attacking you. In these cases, you have to act. For everything else, fear is psychological.
The sooner you realize this, the more action you will take and the more you will achieve.
6. Be Healthy
Few people will tell college students to be healthy. They think they are too young to worry about these things.
Bad health habits develop at a young age and stay with us until we have a health problem. Whether it’s drinking, smoking, bad diet, drugs, or not exercising.
Value your robust health.
Have fun, including some drunk nights and junk food, but don’t overdo it.
7. Take time to find your passions.
Don’t rush into picking a career path. Don’t follow one just because your parents or a professor told you.
Experiment learning what is available in pursuing and at some point it will click. You will know what’s the right direction for you.
Make your own decision.
Your career choice is your work, your time, and, ultimately, your happiness.
So choose wisely.
8. Read excellent books
One single book can change your life, and that’s for the better.
Make sure to dedicate time to reading high-quality books. The sooner in life you have positive influences from books, the greater the long term impact on your life.
Sign up on Goodreads and find amazing books. Get on the Reading Challenge by setting a reading goal for each year.
9. Invest in yourself
Don’t rely only on academic knowledge to learn and improve.
Work on self-development early in your life, don’t wait until your 30’s or 40’s. As Bruce Lee said, “Be like water”.
We live in a world of endless information and learning sources. Please take advantage of them! So much of it is free — online courses, online coaching, YouTube, Udemy, you name it.
Life is a forever classroom. Never say you know enough because your personal development will stop.
New knowledge develops daily in every field. So stay updated in your areas of interest.
10. Spend time with older people.
In your 20’s you think the cool thing is being only with friends of the same age.
The smart thing is balancing time with your family or older friends.
Due to the more prolonged passage of time, older people have more experiences, and know more things.
Please take advantage of it and spend time with them.
They will appreciate the effort you are making and in return will provide you with valuable teachings.
11. Parents are not always right
By nature, from a young age, you have idolized your parents. They brought you to life, so they know better than anyone else.
Parents know this, so they do their utmost to give the best example to their children. That is why becoming a parent is amazing. You bring to life a human being, but you also become the best version of yourself. You have to because of the example you are giving to your children.
That does not mean that everything parents pass on to you is either correct or the best thing for you.
Make sure you take your life decisions, one being your career path. The fact that your parents are doctors does not imply you will become a doctor. Sure it may make them happy, but for your life, your happiness comes first.
Nobody can doubt the best intentions parents have. But you can sure have an open mind and judge yourself whether they provide you with the best advice or not.
Listen to your parents. Don’t always follow them.
12. Don’t regret anything
Life is about taking chances. With that comes failure and significant mistakes.
Don’t regret them, as they are a crucial part of your development and improvement. Be glad you are failing because it means you are trying.
With constant learning and persistence, success naturally follows.
All in all, its about Awareness and Freedom
Realizing that nothing is fixed and that you have the flexibility to move in any direction you want, is the most important understanding of your life.
If you practice all the above, nothing can stop you but yourself.
